Monday, August 15, 2005

The Merits of Video Games

A wise sage that shall in this post only be referenced to as "Kilgs" was so wise that he was actually able to convince women that playing video games was indeed a good thing for their boyfriends and something they should endorse. He did it by stating some simple facts;

1. You know where they are.
2. You know they are not going to get into a fight or commit crimes.
3. It costs less than going out and boozing it up and clubbing.
4. And, if anything video games act as an enforcer of loyalty because you KNOW FOR A FACT there aren't any other women there.

It was because of the wise Kilgs that myself and the St. Paul boys were able to experience a Golden Age of Video Games where we would hold weekend long Halo extravaganza's and the girlfriends were only too happy to drop on by, airlift us food and beer, and then promptly leave whilst we slaughtered each other over the DSL cables.

But alas, this isn't enough to convince the Nanny Fascists from trying to ruin our fun. On top of finding ways to tax smoking, banning smoking, and make headway into villianizing unhealthy foods, the Nanny Fascists are now talking about the "evils" of video games. Making for odd bed-fellows between the religious right fanatics and their traditional tax-for-any-reason-we-can communist enemies.

Once again, time to defend your fun boys against the true forces of evil.

3 comments:

Caliban said...

I too agree with this argument. After presenting it to my significant other, she informed me that the points were invalid because the chances of my doing 2-4 were so low already that there was no marginal benefit to being certain that I wasn't doing them.

That hurt. :)

Captain Capitalism said...

Ouch, that even hurt me!

I always joke with the girls I hang out with that I have the most toned and sexy thumbs in all the world from all the video game playing. Perhaps that would provide additional utility for your wife?

Caliban said...

See, again I lose out. I play computer games, and the keyboard/mouse combination doesn't build up the superior thumb definition.

However, providing foot and shoulder massages to make up for my game-playing crimes has made up for things in the toned and sexy thumb category!